Truth in advertising...

View other fun, old advertisements here...

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital...

Please listen carefully because the menu options have changed. Select from the following options:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.

If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.

This Incredible Creation

I am continually amazed by the one-sidedness of the reporting done by the media about global warming, climate change and other current environmental issues. I guess I shouldn't be amazed, but deep down I hold out hopes that in the end they really want the to get to the Truth, not just to further the trumped-up crisis by aiding and abetting the envrion-fascists.
My most strenuous disagreement with the media's reporting is their unwillingness to admit that there are untold variables in each environmental issue, and that scientists are only beginning to uncover a portion of the complex interconnectedness of creation. They operate from a position of unconscionable arrogance when they claim that they know the cause of whatever global warming crisis might exist. Of course, when a Creator is denied, why should there be any humility?
Anyway, here is another one of those recently discovered variables which effect the global climate - not caused by, nor able to be manipulated by, mankind.

A team of NASA and university scientists has detected an ongoing reversal in Arctic Ocean circulation triggered by atmospheric circulation changes that vary on decade-long time scales. The results suggest not all the large changes seen in Arctic climate in recent years are a result of long-term trends associated with global warming.

...Reporting in Geophysical Research Letters, the authors attribute the reversal to a weakened Arctic Oscillation, a major atmospheric circulation pattern in the northern hemisphere. The weakening reduced the salinity of the upper ocean near the North Pole, decreasing its weight and changing its circulation.

...Morison said data gathered by Grace and the bottom pressure gauges since publication of the paper earlier this year highlight how short-lived the ocean circulation changes can be. The newer data indicate the bottom pressure has increased back toward its 2002 level. "The winter of 2006-2007 was another high Arctic Oscillation year and summer sea ice extent reached a new minimum," he said. "It is too early to say, but it looks as though the Arctic Ocean is ready to start swinging back to the counterclockwise circulation pattern of the 1990s again."

I wonder when this little tidbit will be widely reported in the media.



Thanks to Ace for the news. No thanks to Al Gore, who seems to have overlooked it.

Silent but deadly...

Martin Luther, great man of faith and protestant father, apparently had a unique and effective method of resisting the devil.

'Although I know this [i.e., that I am to rejoice in the Lord and expect good of him], I am of a different mind ten times in the course of a day. But I resist the devil, and often it is with a fart that I chase him away. When he tempts me with silly sins I say, “Devil, yesterday I broke wind too. Have you written it down on your list?” When I say to him, “You have been put to shame,” he believes it, for he does not want to be despised.'

Thanks to Maggie's Farm for the tip

The fruits of rampant political correctness

This is a little disturbing.

and by "a little" I mean "a LOT".

How on EARTH does this sort of thing happen? Ok, yeah, we have lots of illegal immigrants. its a problem.

Good idea #1: how about we NOT give them jobs at the FBI and CIA?? hmm?

Good idea #2: If the "undocumented migrant" happens to be from Lebanon, and you simply HAVE to give her a job with the CIA, how about recognizing a HUGE conflict of interest and assign her to... oh, ANYTHING EXCEPT HIZBALLAH!!!.

morons.

Whiners vs. Succeeders

The creator of 24, a Hollywood conservative, has some great advice for conservatives, advice which also happens to highlight one major difference between conservatives and liberals:

Our job is not to whine, that's their job. Our job is to succeed despite the adversity.

He also goes on to say that Jack Bauer's no-holds-barred approach to fighting terrorism simply represents common sense, something we have dismissed in our fight against terrorism, because we're mired in constitutional and law enforcement issues instead of approaching it like the war that it is. This explains, in part, the show's popularity.

Our Pumpkin 2007

I almost forgot to show you.

Word for the day

paean /ˈpiən/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[pee-uhn]
- noun

1.	any song of praise, joy, or triumph.

2.	a hymn of invocation or thanksgiving to Apollo or some other ancient Greek deity.

as in, Sarkosy's paean to America. This is one Frenchman who is a friend of the United States of America! Nor more freedom fries - we're goin' back to French!



Thanks to Ace for the idea.

Michigan people not so crazy after all...

The 2008 Bullitt Mustang...